by Lucky Charms

Disclaimers: See Part 1

Feedback is always welcome: luckycharms@e-scribblers.com.

Copyright © 2004 by Lucky Charms. All Rights Reserved.

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The screams are what Minerva hears first. Horrible cries of pain and loss that nothing can quell.

The sky above her is dark with a horrible black cloud. Thousands of people scramble around her in order to find safety from an unseen terror.

Minerva turns and sees her friend, Blaize battle desperately with a strange demon with sickly green flesh, large torn wings, and gnashing yellow teeth. There are other people fighting with her. She instantly recognizes Crys among the fray, but how did she get here?

Minerva catches a glimpse of Catt and nearly collapses with shock. Catt was busy fending off another demon with a thick battle staff. "Catt?" She cries.

A man with dark brown hair and emerald green eyes, wearing a jet-black leather tunic, pants, knee high boots, belt, and a white silk shirt, calls out to Minerva in warning.

Before she could react, the man instantly summons a ball of searing fire and incinerates a demon before it could strike her down. The man winks at her and runs off to join, oddly enough, the God Ares.

A small group of women, one with a shield with the symbol of, shockingly enough, a pair of panties painted in the center, another with the symbol of a grand falcon, a third with the symbol of a smiling face, and the fourth with the symbol of a ruler, battle furiously around Minerva, all calling out her name in a battle cry.

The clash of metal rings loudly in Minerva's mind. The screams of innocent people being slaughtered by the demons and their unseen master tears at her soul.

Blaize suddenly appears at her side and calls out her name. "Wake up!" Minerva gives her a funny look. "Come on Minerva, time to get up."

Minerva slowly opens her eyes and sees Blaize and Crys standing over her, smiling. "Good morning." Blaize says cheerfully. "Ready to head out?"

Minerva takes a moment to collect her thoughts and suddenly realizes that she was just dreaming. "Huh? Oh yeah, sure." She mumbles as she runs her hands through her thick brown hair and grimaces as she meets with a tangle.

"I've got breakfast all ready for you." Crys announces cheerfully. "I'll start on preparing some food for you when you start traveling." She walks off.

"Sleep well?" Blaize asks as she helps Minerva to her feet.

"Yeah, had a strange dream though." She shrugs it off. "How about we eat now, huh? We should start out as soon as possible."

Blaize nods and smiles widely as the two walk off toward the kitchen.

"Forgive me for saying this, but you seem oddly eager to start on this trip." Minerva says.

"I'm just happy to actually be able to make a difference." Blaize says cheerfully. "When I first heard of what Jane was doing to the Lurkers, I got really mad. What made things worse is that I couldn't do anything but sit back and hope my chance would come someday." She beams at Minerva. "Now my chance is here and I'm going to take it!"

Minerva smirks. "I wish I had your enthusiasm." She mutters.

"What do you mean?" Blaize asks as the two sit down for a hearty meal.

"I've never been in a real fight before. Sure, I've learned how to use a sword from my father, seeing as I am an only child. It's scary, wondering if today will be the last day you'll ever see the sun or the one you love."

Blaize nods. "I see what you mean, but I don't let that get to me. Sure, it's scary. I mean, who wouldn't be scared? The way I see it, if you're meant to go then you're meant to go." She eyes Minerva thoughtfully for a moment. "I think everything will be fine. If we were chosen by the Gods to save the world from danger, you can be sure as the Underworld that they'll be watching over us!" She laughs.

Minerva smiles faintly. "I guess you're right." But I can't help but miss Catt and hope she'll be alright if something were to happen to me.

An hour or so after the wonderful meal, and a few last minute preparations, Minerva and Blaize saddle up a pair of horses and race off toward the next town and, hopefully, the next Knight of the Big Round Bed.

Ares lets out a mighty yawn and watches Minerva and Blaize as they race by. "Trying to leave me behind ladies?" In an instant, Ares turns back into the black wolf and charges after the two heroes. One step closer to finding you.

The howl of a wolf rings through the forest, accompanied by chilling laughter.

A charming young lady with a blaze of curly red hair and enchanting green eyes dashes through the busy streets of Messagh.

"Stewie!" She calls out to another woman with spiked black hair and mischievous brown eyes. "You'll never guess what I just saw."

Stewie looks at her young friend and grins. "Are you wearing your forbidden under garments, Mary Ann?"

Mary Ann blanches and looks down at her feet. "Well, um, yeah?"

Stewie lets out a deep sigh, crosses her arms and shakes her head. "How many times must I tell you not to wear those when you're in training?"

Mary Ann pouts. "But the leather chafes my legs, and they hurt! Can't I just wear them for one day?" Stewie shakes her head. "It is a squires duty to learn the harshness of battle and real life. You never know, a battle may come one day, and you may be called in pantiless."

"Yes ma'am." Mary Ann mutters, ashamed of her weakness.

Stewie smiles warmly at her squire and gets her a reassuring pat on her back. "That's okay, I was weak once myself. How about you tell me what you saw then you can go change."

Mary Ann smiles. "I saw the merchant caravan just down the path a few moments ago!" She cries excitedly.

Stewie's eyes light up. "Did you see it?"

"I think so, but it was under a lot of boxes, so I couldn't be sure."

Stewie lets out a whoop. "Great! Go change and meet me in the town square okay?" Mary Ann nods and races off.

Stewie watches after her squire fondly before she runs off toward the town square.

Despite the cloudy day Knight Protector Stewie, as the town calls her, is in the brightest of moods. She has been waiting for months to receive her special order from the Ye Old Toy Shoppe located in a city several days travel from Messagh. Words cannot describe the utter joy Stewie will have with her new "toy".

Stewie shoves her way through the wall of awaiting patrons and soon reaches the front of the group and beams up at the whale of a merchant. "Afternoon Merchant, anything here for Knight Protector Stewie?"

The merchant rubs his long beard thoughtfully and orders for his workers to search the caravan. A short while later, a young man calls out to the merchant. Stewie and the merchant walk over to the young man as he pulls out a large crate.

"Ah, a little something from the Ye Old Toy Shoppe I see." The merchant grins as he notices the insignia of the famous Toy Shoppe, which is a black cat paw print with the name of the shop written in lavender. "I hear they make fine "toys" there."

Stewie nods. "I've bought many things from there. Ever since the owner has acquired her new assistant, the most amazing things have come out of there."

"Has anyone ever seen Mistress Jocelyn's new assistant?" The merchant asks.

Stewie shakes her head. "No one has ever seen it." She leans in toward the merchant and whispers. "But those who have tried, has never come out the same person."

A chill wind suddenly blows and a blast of lightning dances across the sky, resulting a boom of thunder.

Stewie looks up as rain begins to plummet to the ground in sheets. "Looks like rain." She mutters.

The merchant nods in agreement. "Too bad, looks like I lose a days work."

Stewie smiles at the merchant and hands him some money for her crate. "Thanks so much for getting it to me in one piece."

The merchant bows grandly. "All in a days work for Günter Von Schtickle."

Stewie chokes back a fit of laughter at the name and turns as Mary Ann rushes up. "Help me with the crate, will yah?"

Mary Ann and Stewie stumble through the muddy streets until they reach their modest home.

"I'll start the fire." Mary Ann says as she places down the heavy crate and walks off to find some wood.

Stewie rubs her hands together and gleams down at her new toy. "At long last," She begins as she lovingly caresses the wooden crate. "My moment is finally here!"

Mary Ann walks back into the small room with some kindling and firewood and places them into the hearth. "Open it!" She says excitedly as she lights the fire. "I can't wait to see it."

Stewie pulls out her sword and places it in the small opening below the top and forces the lid off. She searches through the mass of hay until she finds several slips of paper. She holds the paper to the light of the fire and reads aloud, "Congratulations on owning your very own Panty Cannon…"

"I can't believe this rain." Blaize scowls. "I just hope this fire lives through it."

Minerva smirks as she, after many long moments of trying, manages to light a small fire for her and Blaize. "The trees will provide some cover." She says. "How much longer until we reach the next town?"

Blaize thinks for a minute. "Another hour or so I believe, not much further."

Minerva nods and looks into the fire. "So tell me a little about Crys."

Blaize smiles. "Crys is the best. She straightened me out."

"What do you mean?"

"Well a couple years ago, just after my mom died, I got into drinking. My mom and I were very close. Whenever I got bullied by my brother, or any other boys, she would come to my rescue and tell me how much better I am than they were. Though she loved my brother dearly, I knew I was her favorite. She would always take me out and show me the most wonderful things. But, just before my twenty-first birthday, she got terribly ill. The doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong with her. They've tried every kind of medicine possible." She huddles her legs close to her chest. "I stayed with her every day and night I could. I read her favorite stories to her, combed her hair, anything to make her comfortable. Until one day, I came to bring her breakfast. At the time, I thought she was still asleep, but I was wrong." A tear wells up in her eye and trickles down her face. "She looked so peaceful like that, without anymore pain or any worries. I was so overwhelmed with grief that the only solace I could find was through drinking. That's all I did for a year or so, drink. That was until I met Crys. After I got into a bar fight, she tended my wounds. She was so sweet and gentle to me, even though I was an ass to her. I would through things at her and cuss up a storm." She chuckles. "But she stood by me and helped me get out of my habit." Blaize looks up at Minerva. "I owe everything to her, she's turned my life around for the better."

Jane the Bipolar glares at the two heroes through her mirror in the Reception Hall and nearly spits with disgust. "Revolting!" She snarls. "My stomach churns with loathing."

The picture fades and the chill laughter of Chaos rings through the hall. What do you plan on doing with them?

"What can I do?" Jane says sullenly. "All my men are out searching the land for the Lurkers. It would take days get to any word to them."

Then might I suggest, this? A picture of an enormous monster with four arms, countless eyes, sickly green scaly flesh, and jagged teeth appears in the mirror.

Jane flattens her face against the glass. "And what might this be?"

A minion of mine called, the Horrible Denominator.

"The Horrible Denominator." Jane repeats with a sigh of longing. "You're meaning to set this monster loose upon the world, possibly killing thousands, and leaving a trail of horror and destruction in its path?" She grins widely. "Perfect." Jane cackles insanely, her laugh heard throughout the castle.

Patty looks up from her book and frowns slightly. "I wonder what she's up to now." She shakes her head as she rises to her feet. "Sometimes I worry about my sister."

"You're sister, a sad lady she be." A woman clad in the traditional jester's garb, with long white hair and misty green eyes. "Her heart, angry it is. Happiness she needs!" She announces.

Another woman, also dressed in the jester's garb, with short black hair and sharp blue eyes, shakes her head. "Forgive my partner, Highness, she's a bit loopy."

Patty laughs. "Don't worry about it Sandra, Ms. T is very amusing and does a very good mime act."

Ms. T juts her tongue out at Sandra. "See? Princess sweet she is! A good mime she knows."

Sandra frowns. "Why no one ever taught you proper speech is beyond me." She turns to Patty. "May we entertain you Highness?"

Jane's cackle rings louder and there is a sudden loud boom. Patty lurches to her feet and races toward the door. "Come with me you two."

Sandra and Ms. T reluctantly follow after Patty as she makes her way toward the Reception Hall.

Patty pounds on the large doors and calls out her sister's name. "Is everything alright in there?"

"Go away and leave me alone!" Jane bellows.

"I heard a loud sound, I just wanted to make sure you're alright."

"What loud sound? You must be hearing things Patty. Go back to your room and read, or do whatever it is you do to occupy your mind." Jane snaps.

Not at all hurt by Jane's mean words, Patty shakes her head slowly. "I wonder what she's doing in there."

"It's best that you leave the Empress to her deeds Princess." Sandra advises.

Ms. T frowns. "In there, evil things she is doing."

Sandra scowls at her partner. "Don't say such things in front of the Princess."

"It's okay Sandra," Patty says soothingly. "Everybody is entitled to his or her own opinion." She turns back to the doors and a thoughtful expression covers her gentle face. "I, too, can't help but wonder what she's really up to in there."

"No wait, the leather harness is supposed to go there." Stewie points to an area at the back of the cannon.

"Oh I get it!" Mary Ann says. "It's like a strap you place on yourself to hold the cannon."

Stewie grins. "I can't wait to try this out." She reads a small section of the papers. "It even says there's unlimited ammunition!"

Mary Ann cries out. "Really? Can I try it?"

"Of course you can't." She laughs when Mary Ann's face darkens with disappointment. "I was only kidding. You can try it after I get a chance."

A few moments later, Mary Ann and Stewie attach the last piece of the cannon and gaze at it in awe.

"It's so beautiful." Mary Ann says lowly.

The Panty Cannon is made to look like any other cannon you'll see on a ship or within the battle grounds, though much lighter and smaller. The leather harness was made so you are able to hang the cannon over your shoulders comfortably.

"Hey look," Mary Ann says looking at the papers. "There's even a spell to make the cannon shrink to travel size.

"Really? What's the spell?"

Mary Ann stumbles on the word for a bit. "Oh, I got it. Pitya!"

The cannon begins to glow slightly and little multicolored sparkles dance around the cannon. The cannon rises off the floor and begins to shake slightly. In a puff of gray smoke, the cannon shrinks to the size of a mouse.

Stewie gently picks up the miniature cannon and nearly bursts with giddiness. "This is so neat! How do you make it go back to normal?" She asks placing the cannon back on the floor.

"Ah, Alta!" Mary Ann calls, and in the same fashion the cannon returns to its normal size.

Stewie grabs the papers and skims the pages. "Lets see, how to clean, blah blah blah." She pauses. "Ah hah! How to fire the cannon. Now, all I have to say is," There's a knocking on the door. "Who is it?"

"Knight Protector we, uh, have a problem here." A voice calls from behind the closed door.

Stewie and Mary Ann give each other disappointed looks and slowly rise to their feet. Stewie struts over to the door and opens it. "Hi Jogger, what can I do for you?"

Jogger motions for Stewie and Mary Ann to follow him. Lucky for them, the rain has stopped and the sun is beginning to shine through. "I think you should see this for yourself."

Mary Ann looks around the empty streets. "Where is everybody? You would think they would come out after the rain has stopped."

The trio turns a corner of the street and stop as they see a small horde of ogres. "That," Jogger points. "Is why everybody's inside."

Günter runs up to Stewie, his chubby arms flailing in the air. "Ms. Stewie, you simply have got to stop those ogres. They're destroying my caravan!" He cries gnawing on his fingers.

Stewie narrows her eyes and glares at the ogres. "Mary Ann," She says gruffly. "Get me my sword, shield, and my special belt."

Mary Ann gasps. "No! Not the, special belt."

"The very one." She says lowly. "Hurry now. We don't know when those stinking ogres will attack the city." Stewie says dramatically.

Mary Ann rushes off. "What are you going to do now Knight Protector?" Jogger asks.

"Cause a ruckus." Stewie says menacingly. "You two head back to your homes, or some place safe. I've got work to do."

Shortly after Jogger and Günter rush to safety, Mary Ann returns with Stewie's equipment. "Are you sure about this?" She asks, worried. "You've never tried using your special belt before."

Stewie takes her belt and wraps it around her thin waist and smirks at Mary Ann. "Thank you for your concern Mary Ann. One of the greatest lessons in being a Knight is learning compassion for your fellow Knights. Another is learning to take great risks, even if it means your life."

Mary Ann nods. "I see. I'll be standing by if you need any help."

Stewie affectionately ruffles Mary Ann's fiery red hair. "Thanks. I'll remember that." She places her sword on her belt and readies her shield, which has the symbol of a pair of panties etched on it. "Knight Protector Stewie, away!" She bellows as she dashes off toward the ogres.

The small group of ogres hover over Günter's caravan and toss about several rolls of silk, and various merchandise.

Suddenly a mist of silken undergarments flutter past the ogres and they slowly turn to see the cause of the strange happenings.

"You dare enter this fair city and befoul it with your putrid souls." Stewie calls out as a single beam of light emerges from the clouds. "As my duty as Knight Protector Stewie, I shall right all wrongs and defend this city. On behalf of all panty lovers, I'll vanquish you!" Stewie strikes a pose and a mist of panties swarms around her.

Mary Ann begins to applaud enthusiastically, while the ogres stare at Stewie in complete loss.

Realizing that she's the only one clapping, Mary Ann slowly ceases her applaud and stuffs her hands in her pockets.

Stewie frowns. "What? My introduction wasn't good enough for you?" The ogres begin to roar ferociously and charge Stewie, their grime covered claws outstretched.

Stewie smirks slightly and grabs for an item in her special belt. She then leaps high in the air and hurls the lacey object toward the ogres below. The small item falls to the ground and lands a few feet in front of the ogres, who stop to investigate it.

"Panty." An ogre says and grins stupidly.

Suddenly, the panty gains a life of it's own and grows to an immense size and wraps itself around a small group of ogres, their hairy legs dangling outside the bottom holes.

Stewie guffaws pompously. "You are no match for me! Be off with you before I get real mad."

The three remaining ogres snarl in outrage and continue their assail onto Stewie. They pull out nasty looking sword from Gods know where, seeing as they're only wearing fur loin clothes, and attack Stewie.

Stewie fends off an attack and sends a nasty kick into an ogre's groin. She then turns and deflects another attack and slices viciously at the ogre.

The third, and largest, ogre grabs Stewie's arms from behind and lifts her off the ground. "You hurt Tiny's friend. Tiny hurt you!"

Tiny begins to stretch out Stewie's arms like a doll and she cries out in pain. Tiny giggles like a drunken fool as he pulls at Stewie's legs.

Mary Ann appears from around the corner, holding the Panty Cannon, and calls out to the ogre. "Hey ugly, over here!"

The ogre drops Stewie carelessly and turns on Mary Ann. "What you got there?"

"Úr!" Mary Ann bellows and in a burst of sparkles and a loud boom, a mass of panties shoot out of the cannon and slam into the ogre, knocking him to the ground in a heap of silk and lace.

Mary Ann drops the cannon and rushes to Stewie's side. "You okay?"

Stewie nods. "Yeah, good thinking with the cannon Mary Ann." She winks. "But I wanted my turn first."

Mary Ann laughs. "Should I prepare the DeOGREisor?"

Stewie's eyes glimmer evilly. "Of course, I'll help." The two race toward Stewie's house and grab a large band of thick elastic and giggle at each other. "It's been a while huh? How far do you think we'll get them this time?" Stewie asks.

"I don't know, let's try for the lake this time." Mary Ann replies as the to make their way out of the house and into the Square.

Several people, brave souls that they are, make their way out of their houses as they see Mary Ann and Stewie tie up the elastic to two thick poles on opposite ends of the Town Square.

Their first task finished, Mary Ann and Stewie drag the trolls contained in the large panty along with the other three and place them in the center of the elastic band.

"Okay, they rested in?" Stewie asks as she jumps behind the DeOGREisor.

Mary Ann nods as she joins Stewie. "It's a long way to the lake so we're really gonna need some pull on this."

The two grab the elastic and tug back on the DeOGREisor with all their might until they go back as far as they can.

Now there is a large crowd of people, muttering excitedly to themselves as Stewie and Mary Ann prepare to launch the ogres to places unknown.

Stewie notices the crowd and grins. "Alright everybody, on the count of three!"

The entire town joins Stewie in the count and as soon as the ogres are flung in the air with a resonating "thwap" the town erupts with cheers and panties being tossed in the air.

Blaize and Minerva pause their conversation as they see a large mass of ogres soar over the air above them.

"Huh, I wonder what that was about." Blaize says.

Minerva turns her head as she hears a loud splashing behind her and she grins. "Good thing we took our bath before they got there."

The two friends laugh heartily. "So tell me," Blaize begins. "What made you accept Gaia's offer?"

Minerva shrugs. "To be honest, I don't really know. I guess it's the sense of adventure, or the fact that it's the right thing to do. I don't agree with Jane's idea of killing off the Lurkers, especially since they're so important to us all now."

"Do you miss Catt?" Blaize asks.

Minerva smiles slightly at the thought of her beloved. "Yeah, I do. I'm sure she's fine though. She's always been the strong one."

Blaize chuckles. "Imagine two women like us whimpering like babies."

Minerva jumps slightly as she hears the sound of a cracking whip in the distance. "What was that?"

"Sounded like a whip." Blaize says curiously. "I swear there's something strange going on around here. Flying ogres, mysterious sounds, seven dwarves marching around in that cave over there."

Minerva's eyes widen in shock as she sees seven little men with long beards, except one, hacking away in their cave, whistling an obnoxious tune.

"Lets hurry on, shall we?" Minerva urges her horse into a gallop, and Blaize follows close behind.

A particularly mean looking dwarf gazes after Minerva and Blaize as they race off and shrugs. "Hey Nurse, hand me the pick ax will yah?"

"Sure things Angry." The dwarf with small glasses tosses Angry a pick ax and returns to his work.

"Say Introvert," A dwarf with an insanely red nose sniffs. "Could you wake up Snoozy for me? I need his … his …" The dwarf lets out a monstrous sneeze. "Help."

"Um, okay Sickly." Introvert says cautiously and he pads over to the snoring dwarf.

"Oh, I'm just stho exthited it's such a sthunny day! Aren't you Sthtupid?"

The dwarf with no facial hair looks at the excessively happy dwarf and smiles ignorantly.

"Oh, I'm just tickled pink. Oh look a woodpecker!" The happy dwarf giggles like a little girl.

"Hey Gay!" Angry snaps. "Stop being to damn happy all the time and get back to work!"

A large black wolf peers his head into the cave, shudders in fear and dashes off. Something's wrong here. I can sense an evil presence in the forest, but what is it.

Without warning, a man with wings attached to his ankles and clad in a white toga appears in front of Ares.

Ares screams to a halt and changes back into his normal form. "What do you want Hermes?" Hermes grins slightly and arches a brow, making Ares scowl.

Hermes laughs. "I'm only teasing brother. Any luck finding your little "target" yet?"

Ares' scowl deepens and his eyes flash with impatience. "Tell me why you're here. I have business to take care of."

"Zeus wishes all Gods and Goddesses back home at Olympus."

"Why?"

"Don't ask me, I'm just a messenger."

Ares heaves out a sigh and nods his head. "Alright, I'll be there." He vanishes in a burst of flames.

Hermes smirks and faces the direction where Minerva and Blaize were traveling. "You know, I could be the good little messenger and alert those girls about the danger ahead of them. Then again I've never been a fan of mortals." He shrugs. "I guess that fixes things." He vanishes, laughing.

Patty gazes out her window at the setting sun and lets out a sigh. "I have to find out what she's up to."

Sandra's eyes widen in fear. "No Princess, you mustn't. The Empress would surly have our heads cut off."

"Empress's sister she is!" Ms. T objects. "Kill her she won't."

"Please, no more arguing you two." She pleads. "My sister usually goes to visit the temple of Ares when the sun sets. She'll be gone for a while which will give us ample time to investigate the Reception Hall." Ms. T's eyes glimmer while Sandra's eyes darken with worry. "You don't have to come with me you know." Patty adds. "I'll be fine by myself."

Sandra and Ms. T look at each other, and then nod in mutual understanding. "We'll go with you Princess." Sandra says.

"Adventure this is! Fun it will be." Ms. T adds.

Meanwhile, Jane paces around the Reception Hall impatiently. "What's taking that thing so long?" She snarls. "It should be here by now."

Patience Jane. These things take time. Chaos says lowly.

"I don't have any patience! I've waited years for this moment, and I won't be thwarted by some peasant in skimpy leather armor."

The short time you've been on this measly planet is nothing compared to the countless centuries I've be imprisoned within the void, Jane.

Jane snorts and storms over to a window and sees the sun just setting below the horizon. "I have to go now." She says and exits the Reception Hall.

Patty and her comrades peer their heads around the corner and see Jane storm down the hallway towards the castle gates.

"Great, she's leaving." Patty says.

"What, exactly, are we looking for?" Sandra whispers.

"I have no idea, just anything out of the ordinary." Patty replies.

The three walk cautiously down the hall until they face the Reception Hall. Patty slowly opens the doors and they make their way in. "Okay, just spread out and be careful not to knock anything over."

Patty makes her way toward the back of the hall and examines the throne and any desk she comes across.

Ms. T happily skips by Patty and finds the mirror hidden behind a thin veil of black silk. "Look!" She cries. "Mirror I have found."

Sandra and Patty walk up to Ms. T. "It definitely is a strange mirror." Patty says, examining the mirror.

The mirror is bordered with gold carved to resemble skeletons and other ghastly figures. The glass bears no reflection.

"What do you think?" Sandra asks.

"It's best we leave it alone." Patty advises.

"Take it we will!" Ms. T says as she grabs for the mirror.

"No T, don't!" Sandra grabs her friend's wrist, and as Ms. T's fingers touch the mirror, a blast of electric power surges through them and throws them back onto the floor.

"Are you two alright?" Patty gasps, kneeling beside the two jesters.

Ms. T gazes at Patty, and smiles faintly. "Alright I am. Sandra?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." Sandra says as she rises to her feet. "What was that?"

"I don't know, but I think this may be the thing we're looking for." Patty says, looking at the strange mirror.

There is the sound of the Hall doors creaking open and the three prowlers gasp in shock.

"Quickly, behind that tapestry." Patty whispers, pointing to a large low hanging tapestry.

The three dash for the tapestry and cover themselves, hoping the person who just entered the room would leave quickly.

Patty cautiously peers her head out and spies a small, older woman with graying brown hair kept in a tight bun, sharp brown eyes, and is wearing a maid's uniform.

"By the Gods," The woman grumbles. "Empress or not, a lady should never allow a place to become to utterly dirty. She pulls out a feather duster and begins dusting off various vases and chairs.

Ms. T gets a sudden tingle in her nose and her face contorts as she readies to sneeze.

Sandra catches the motion out of the corner of her eye and she sends a nasty glance at Ms. T. "Don't you dare." She whispers and places her finger under Ms. T's nose.

"Will you two stop moving, she's coming over here!" Patty cries softly.

The three freeze as they hear the maid's humming approach them. Ms. T's face contorts again and she inhales deeply. Sandra pleads to Ms. T not to sneeze with her eyes. Ms. T lets out an enormous sneeze and Sandra lets out a roar of disgust.

"Oh dear Gods, I have snot on my finger!" She bursts out from behind the tapestry and nearly runs into the maid.

The maid screams in horror, then Sandra screams in horror at the maid. Suddenly, Ms. T bursts out, screaming in horror at a large spider that has attached itself to her face. Patty comes barreling out, screaming at Ms. T to bat the spider off, but Ms. T runs blindly around the Hall, screaming bloody murder.

The maid and Sandra continue to scream at each other, until they notice the huge spider on Ms. T, then the maid runs screaming out of the Hall. Ms. T manages to run out of the Hall, the spider still on her face, and Patty and Sandra run out of the Hall, screaming at Ms. T.

When all is silent, a deep and chilling chuckle fills the room. Naughty Princess, snooping around in places she shouldn't be. The chuckle continues as the doors to the Hall shut themselves.

The next morning, Minerva and Blaize awaken to the morning sun and greet each other.

"Sleep well?" Blaize asks.

"Yeah." Minerva yawns. "Good thing we got into town before the Inn closed."

"I see what you mean. I'm not a big fan of sleeping under the stars."

Minerva chuckles. "It's not so bad, once you get used to it. Seeing as we have a while to go yet, we may have to."

Blaize grimaces. "I pray to the Gods that doesn't happen."

"Be careful, the Gods can be pretty spiteful."

Blaize slowly removes herself from the warm bed and stretches. "So should we look around here for another Knight?"

Minerva shrugs. "We might as well. It's a pretty small town." She stretches and yawns again. "I'm sure we'll know if, and when, we find the next Knight."

"Do you think it'll be another girl?" Blaize asks putting her armor on.

"Couldn't tell you. Gaia didn't tell me very much, remember."

Blaize snorts. "You would figure that she would be more helpful in this, or at least handle it herself."

Minerva smiles faintly. "Well, I'm sure we'll be fine without her." She says as she places her armor on. "Let's go find something to eat first."

Blaize grins widely. "A woman after my own heart." She says and the two make their way out of the Inn.

"Must've rained again last night." Minerva says when she notices a puddle when they walk by toward the local tavern.

As Minerva and Blaize enter the tavern, the puddle begins to ripple like something large; something horrible, something evil is making it's way toward the small town.

Stewie and Mary Ann pause a moment. "Did you feel something?" Stewie asks. "Feels like something large; something horrible, something evil is making it's way toward the town."

Mary Ann laughs. "Sorry, did feel anything. I just feel my stupid trousers chafing my legs."

Stewie grins. "Ah, so you're training yourself then, good girl. We'll have those legs scarred up in no time." Mary Ann whimpers in fright as the two walk by toward the town market.

"So what do you think?" Blaize asks Minerva as the sit at a table.

"I don't know," Minerva replies. "I don't see anyone around here that comes across as one of the Knights."

Blaize shrugs. "Maybe they'll come to you."

A large woman walks up to Minerva and Blaize. "What can I get for you ladies?" She grumbles.

Minerva and Blaize order their food and the woman waddles off. As she walks off, the floor below them begins to shake violently.

Blaize and Minerva snicker at each other. "Did she do that?" Blaize chuckles.

"I don't know!" Minerva laughs.

Suddenly a voice booms throughout the town, causing people to run about in fear. "MINERVA! WHERE ARE YOU?" The voice calls.

Minerva and Blaize look at each other and they race out of the tavern to see who's responsible for the uproar.

As they reach the town square, the two see an enormous monster with four arms, hundreds of beady red eyes, green scaly flesh, and jagged yellow teeth.

"Holy Hera, what is that?" Minerva cries.

The monster looks down at Minerva and Blaize and laughs. "So you finally show yourself, Minerva."

"Who are you?" Minerva demands.

"I am the Horrible Denominator!" The monster cackles as lightning dances across the sky. "Now, prepare to meet your doom!" The Horrible Denominator raises its foot and prepares to flatten Minerva, but she calls out to him.

"Wait a second! This isn't fair. How am I supposed to defend myself?" She snaps.

The Horrible Denominator places his foot aside, smashing a house in the process, and looks down at Minerva, confused. "What do you mean?"

"I know you're a demon, and hence the pure spawn of evil, but come on! Don't you believe in a fair fight?"

The monster scratches its chin a moment. "Oh, I guess you're right. But don't expect me to take it easy on you." The monster says as he shrinks down to the size of a normal man. "Does this work?"

Minerva nods. "Thank you. Now we can fight." She pulls out her sword.

Blaize follows suit and attacks the monster. "I strike at thee!"

The Horrible Denominator deflects of Blaize's sword with ease and tosses her aside.

Minerva belts out a battle cry and slashes violently at the demon. The Denominator's claws grow out several inches longer and he expertly deflects Minerva's attack.

Blaize leaps to her feet and charges the demon again and she throws her body into the monster's side, causing him to fall to the ground into a puddle.

"Thanks." Minerva says breathlessly.

The Horrible Denominator clamors to his feet and wipes off the mud from his face. "Not bad, but can you handle this?" He aims his hands at Minerva and suddenly his claws shoot out of his fingers toward her.

Blaize dives out of the way. "Minerva watch out!"

Suddenly there is a low humming sound and the world around Minerva seems to run in slow motion. She bends back as far as she could, but her feet remain miraculously on the ground. She sees the claws whirl by above her. Little ripples expand from the claws as they slowly go by.

Time returns to normal and Minerva rights herself. The monster roars out in outrage. "How'd you do that?" He demands.

Blaize rushes to her friend's side. "Teach me how to do that sometime?" She asks.

"If I knew how I did it, I'll tell yah."

The monster stamps his feet in frustration. "Alright, it's time for me to pull out the big guns!" He cackles as he reaches behind his back, and then pulls out a large amount of chili peppers.

Minerva and Blaize gasp as the Horrible Denominator inhales every last chili in his hand. "You're going to get heartburn." Blaize warns.

The monster guffaws. "Not heartburn, just a horrible case of gas!" Minerva and Blaize make a face of disgust as the demons stomach begins to make obscene churning noises. The monster turns around and bends over. "Fire one!"

In a blast of natural gas, a huge ball of green flame erupts from the monsters rear and hurls toward Minerva and Blaize. The two dive out of the way to safety.

"Oh come on!" Blaize cries. "That's just sick."

"Fire two!" The monster cries and aims another fireball at Blaize.

Blaize dives out of the way, but the fireball hits the tavern behind her and the place bursts into flames.

"Fire three!" The demon calls again, this time aiming a fireball at Minerva.

Minerva bellows out another war cry and leaps high into the air. The fireball slams into a choice placed barrel of oil and it explodes, tossing flames into every house within reach.

An embittered old woman storms out of her house just as it bursts into flames. "Damn it, I just replaced the shingles!" She snarls as she attempts to beat the flames out with a straw broom.

The monster grabs Blaize and Minerva and toss them away like rag dolls, cackling like a crazed lunatic.

"He's too strong for us Minerva. We have to find a way to stop him before he destroys the city."

The monster roars with laughter as he pulls out another large heap of chili peppers.

Minerva and Blaize brace themselves for another attack as the demon turns around and bends over. "Say bye-bye ladies!" He begins to laugh insanely, but his moment is cut short when he receives a searing pain. "What the?" He turns around and sees Stewie behind him; her Panty Cannon shoved high into his rear.

"I think you're the one who should be saying bye-bye." Stewie grins evilly.

The demon's eyes grow wide with fear. "You wouldn't dare!"

"Oh wouldn't I?" Stewie calls out the magic word and the demon balloons up to massive proportions before he explodes into a rain of panties and sparkles.

Mary Ann lets out a whoop of joy and races over to her Knight and wraps her arms around her. "You were great!" She calls as she pulls back.

Minerva and Blaize walk up to Stewie. "Indeed, you were impressive, taking that demon on like that." Minerva says.

"What's your name?" Blaize asks.

"I am called Knight Protector Stewie." Stewie announces. "And this is my squire, Mary Ann."

"Well, Knight Protector Stewie, my name is Minerva and this is Blaize. We're on a quest to save the world from the evil Jane the Bipolar, and with the skills you've just shown today, I think we could use someone like you. What do you say, will you join us as a Knight of the Big Round Bed?"

Stewie and Mary Ann look at each other and shrug. "Why not? Sounds like fun!" Stewie says and she shakes Minerva's hand.

The dark clouds part and a beam of light shines upon the small group of heroes and a flock of doves fly above them. "Then let me welcome you Stewie, as our sister in the Big Round Bed."

A pair of sodden panties falls onto Minerva's head and she begins to giggle uncontrollably.

Blaize joins into the laughter and playfully tosses a pile of panties at Minerva. Before too long, the group and the town, are all involved in a large panty-ball fight.

And so, Minerva has found the second member of the destined Knights of the Big Round Bed. The evil Horrible Denominator has been vanquished by the heroic deed of Knight Protector Stewie with the aid of her glorious Panty Cannon.

We all can rest easy now, knowing that Good has new champions, Minerva and her Knights of the Big Round Bed.

Next time on MINERVA: WARRIOR EMPRESS

Having found the second member of the Knights of the Big Round Bed, Minerva and her friends set out in search of the third member. Upon reaching the famed city of Ashmire, our heroes find that there be trouble in paradise. A mysterious ghost named "The Streaker" has been sending a wave of fear to the citizens. So, our daring heroines take it upon themselves to solve the mystery and hopefully find the third member as well. Who, or what, is "The Streaker"? Find out next time in…

Bare Necessities: The Ghost of Ashmire

Continued in Part 3

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