by Alex Tryst

Dedication & Author's Note: See Chapter 1.

Feedback: Drop me a line if you’d like at alextryst@e-scribblers.com.

Copyright © June, 2008 by Alex Tryst. All Rights Reserved.

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Over the course of the next few months Alexa and Lauren carried on as if nothing had changed between them. Not once did they discuss the heir’s upcoming wedding to Lady Adams, instead preferring to live in the fantasy they had created with each other. However, once Alexa had finished flight school and helped Lauren settle into her new job and new home, it became more real that the princess would have to inevitably marry. Even though the lovers still didn’t speak on it, their relationship began to have a strain that had not previously been there.

One night Alexa had come to Lauren’s house for dinner and time alone together, but when the redhead answered the door, the princess knew she had been crying. “Darling, what is the matter?” she questioned trying to embrace her lover.

Her affection was rebuffed though as Lauren pointed to something on her coffee table. “How could you hurt me like this?” she asked in tears.

“What have I done?”

“Pick it up,” the librarian stated, thrusting her finger toward the coffee table once again.

Alexa moved into the room and picked up the cream colored envelope that was sitting open on the table. She removed what was inside and read its contents. Her heart sank seeing her wedding invitation. “Oh, God. Lauren, you have to believe me. I did not send this to you. I would never hurt you in such a deliberate manner. You must believe me. My mother made the guest list. I was never consulted.”

“Oh? So it is your mother that believes I should attend your wedding to another woman? Do you expect me to believe that?”

“I have no other explanation, Lauren. Do you actually think I want you there to witness it? It is one thing for me to inflict torture upon myself in the name of my country. I would never want to do that to you. I love you.”

The redhead sighed but said nothing at first. Finally she whispered, “This is really happening.”

Alexa stepped to her and embraced her closely. “I am terribly sorry, darling.”

“I am not sure I have the strength to do this, Alexa.”

“What would you have me do? Abdicate the throne? That is my only recourse. If I do not marry Meredith, I will have to abdicate. My mother will see no alternative. Is that what you wish me to do?”

Lauren looked into the eyes she loved so much. Her heart screamed yes to the posed question, but she merely answered, “That is a decision you can only make for yourself.”

Not letting the issue go, Alexa pressed, “If I abdicated, we could be together. We could be married.”

“But what would you do with yourself? What would you do with your life? You are the crowned princess. That is the only life you know.”

“I could stay in the military. I can continue to be a Navy pilot. That could be my career. I could still take care of you that way. It would just be the two of us, you, my sexy little librarian and me, Flash, just Flash. No media, no attention, just the two of us living our life happily ever after.”

A moment passed in silence. Unable to resist Lauren quietly inquired, “Would you really abdicate your throne for me?”

Alexa gave a tender smile. “If I was able to propose marriage to you right now, would you say yes?”

“Yes,” the older woman confessed in a whisper. It was in fact her greatest wish, one she knew would never come true. However, it never stopped her from dreaming.

“You would do me the greatest honor in the world. You would make the ultimate sacrifice for our love. Why would I not do the same?”

“Getting married and abdication are considerably different things, Lex. If you were to ask me to marry you, I would say yes. Of course I would. Who would not? However, you are meant to be the ruler of this country.”

“Our child could rule in my stead. They would become the next in line for the throne.”

“Would you want that for our child? Would you want to sacrifice them the way you are being sacrificed? Would your mother ever look upon our child as the rightful heir to the throne?”

“Then George can rule, and the line be passed on through Morgan. We would not have to sacrifice our child. It can be done.”

Lauren shook her head. “This is a ridiculous notion. I do not know why we are even discussing it. You cannot abdicate. It would not be fulfilling your destiny.”

“My destiny is my choice. Please allow me to do this for you.”

“I cannot. You cannot do this for me. It would not be right. Now I do not wish to discuss it any further. The fact that you would be so self-sacrificing as to even suggest such a thing will have to be enough for me. I know you love me, Lex. I do not doubt that.”

“Good. See that you never do.” The rest of the evening the two women did not speak of anything. They simply sat cuddled together on the sofa watching TV and trying to forget the looming calamity that would take place in two month’s time.

The next morning after Lauren went to work, Alexa returned to the palace. She immediately inquired as to her mother’s whereabouts and heard she could be found in her office with Lady Adams. Heading that direction she found her mother and fiancée having tea.

“Lex, where have you been?” Meredith inquired, coming to kiss her fiancée on the cheek.

“My whereabouts are none of your concern, Mere. I must speak to my mother alone at once.”

Queen Faith smiled at Meredith before saying, “Leave us. We will continue this conversation later.” When they were alone, she asked, “What seems to be the trouble, Alexa?”

“You so callously had a wedding invitation delivered to Lauren! How could you do that to her?”

“My dear child, she is your friend. I thought you wanted all your friends invited to your wedding. I did not know she was an exception.”

“You know she is not my friend! She is the woman I love, Mother, and you have hurt you! I will not stand for it!”

“Then what do you propose to do about it? I am sorry I caused her pain, but she must know you are to be wed. She cannot possibly live in the fantasy of your love affair forever. The reality is that you are intended to someone else.”

“I refuse to marry Meredith, Mother. She is a nice girl, but I do not love her. I will not marry her. She does not even love me. She just wants the crown.”

“You will marry her, Alexa, because I told you to marry her. What other resort do you have?”

Alexa took a deep breath to fortify her courage. She was terrified of the next words she was to say, but she knew she would do anything to be with her beloved. “I am prepared to abdicate my rightful place as heir to the throne, Mother. Lauren is the woman I choose to be with the rest of my life, and I will be with her with or without your blessing. If I must abdicate to do that, then I will do so,” she stated in seriousness.

There was silence between them for several moments. Finally the queen spoke. “Do you understand the gravity of what you have just said, Alexa?”

“Yes, Mother. I do.”

“Well, before you do anything rash, I will ask you to contemplate all possible consequences of this suggested action. Give yourself a few weeks to consider your options. Consult with your father and brother on this idea. Consult with Lady Adams. After all, she is your fiancée and will be affected by this decision. If after you have done all those things, you still wish to abdicate to be with your lover, then I shall be obliged to allow you to do so, and we will hold a press conference in which you can publicly renounce your throne. Until such time as we discuss this again, I simply ask that you do not speak to any of the public about this. Are we in agreement?”

Alexa nodded her head. “Yes.”

“Good. We will speak on this again in three week’s time. Do yourself a favor, Alexa, and truly consider your actions. Once you renounce your rights, they cannot ever be reinstated. You will still be a member of the royal family of course, but your claim to the throne will permanently cease to be. George would become first in line unless you had children. Then it would automatically be passed down to them unless I decree otherwise. You having a child with that commoner would probably persuade me to decree that Morgan take the throne after George. Do you want that for your children? Please think seriously on the matter. It is not just your life at stake but that of your offspring as well.”

“I will think on this as we agreed, Mother, but I doubt I will change my mind.”

“Very well. You may go now.”

Turning on her heels, Alexa opened the door to her mother’s office and stepped into the hallway. Not surprisingly she found Meredith lingering near the door. “I need to speak to you, Mere.” The younger woman nodded her head and followed the princess down the hall to her own office. Gesturing to a seat for her bride-to-be, Alexa took a seat on the sofa. Meredith joined her there. “How much of that conversation did you hear?”

“Enough to know that librarian holds you heart, not me.”

“Well, then let us be honest about why we are choosing to be married then, shall we? I will go first. You are a pleasant woman, Mere. I like you as a friend. I know you would make the acceptable spouse in my mother’s eyes. You are the obvious choice to carry on the Washington line. These are all valid reasons to be married, but I am in love with another woman.”

“I know that. I have known that for quite some time.”

“Then why agree to marry me?”

“For all the reasons you have already stated. My parents raised me with the intention of one day being your wife. It is my destiny to become wife of the princess and bear your children for the house of Washington. I love you much more than you do me. I know this, but I go into this marriage hoping that I might one day have your love completely. I see the way you look at me. You are not without interest. I know this for a fact. You cannot deny me that. I hold this close to me as a beginning, and maybe in time there will be more. I always have been and always will be your humble servant, Lex. I am prepared to take my place beside you and do whatever it is you ask of me,” she answered, leaning over and touching Alexa’s cheek softly. Her lips brushed against the heir’s gently. “Only I will fulfill all your desires. It is my duty to serve you and attend to your wants. I know my place, Lex. Can you say the same for your librarian? Does she know what you deserve? Will she give you everything you want and desire? Does she accept that your word is the only opinion that matters?”

Alexa closed her eyes as she allowed Meredith’s kissing to persist. The teenager posed some interesting questions. Furthermore, she knew she didn’t have those answers. “If I were to abdicate, then my opinion would not be the only one that mattered.”

“Abdicate? What are you talking about? What do you mean abdicate?” Meredith asked pulling back.

“I told my mother today that I was contemplating renouncing my throne.”

“Why would you do such a thing? You are the rightful heir, and the people want to see you rule. They want to see us together.”

“You mean we would not be together if I were to abdicate? That should not change things between us. I would still need heirs for the line. Our children would succeed my mother, not me. They would still have a rightful place, but I could not achieve that without you.”

“But then you would never be queen. Do you not wish to be queen?”

“At this moment I do not care whether or not I am queen. However, I think you do. You wish to be queen. Am I right? If I were to abdicate, you would be denied your chance to be queen. Could you marry me knowing that might never be?” Meredith sat perfectly still for several moments not answering. Seeing her hesitation, the princess said, “You can answer me honestly, Mere. As of this moment, we are still engaged. If I were to abdicate, I would release you from your obligation if you asked me to. I just want to know where we stand. Would you still marry me if I decided to abdicate?”

“I love you, Lex. Do not misunderstand that. However, if I were not to be queen, I would request that you would release me, so I could pursue other ambitions in life. I am prepared to sacrifice myself for the country if needed, but it would not be needed if you were not to become queen.”

“As I suspected. Well, at least we both know where the other stands. I appreciate your honesty, Mere. I hope you can respect mine in return.”

The younger woman nodded her head. “I should go. The queen is expecting me back in her office. Allow me to ask one favor of you? If you do decide to abdicate, please tell me before you tell the people. I would like to be the first to know outside your family of course.”

“Of course. I can grant you that request.”

“Thank you.”

By the time the evening meal came around, both Thomas and George had heard the news from the queen what Alexa was contemplating. Her brother came to her after dinner in a huff as she prepared to return to her lover’s house. “Tell me you are not serious?” George asked.

“I am perfectly serious, George. I love Lauren enough to give up my kingdom. It means nothing to me when compared to her.”

“But think about what this means for the rest of us? Think about me, Lex! I do not wish to be king! I am not meant to be king! You are the one meant for the role! You are the strong one! You are the one people adore! They want you to be their queen, Lex! They do not wish to see me sitting on the throne!”

She shook her head. “You are fortunate to have been able to marry the woman you love. Can you not understand that I simply want the same thing?”

“Yes, I married the woman I loved, Lex, but she was still noble blood! Do you honestly think Mother would have allowed me to marry her had she not been? I would not have expected her to! If she were not, I would have still loved her, even though I would have married someone else!”

“Would she have loved you, though? Tell me. How would you feel if you could not be with her? I just want to be with Lauren. Either I abdicate or Mother decrees that I may marry whom I chose. You know she will not change her mind once it has been set. It is my only option.”

“I am begging you not to do this! Please, for the love of the people, do not do this! Think of the hundreds of millions of people that you will let down! No one in the history of our family has ever abdicated! It just is not done! Lauren will still love you even if you have to marry another!”

“I do not want to marry another. I want to marry her, George. Why can you not understand that?”

“You are being selfish! The world is counting on you! You are the world’s next great leader! You were born to play the role! When you become queen you can decree whatever you choose! You can renounce this law that prevents you from marrying Lauren, so our children and our children’s children can marry whomever they choose! You are to make history! That is your destiny! Do not pawn it off on me! I will never be the ruler you could! You know this! Please do not do this!”

“George, I will not argue with you. It is true what you say. However, I hope you could one day understand why I had to do this. When you are king, you can save our children’s children. As for me I just wish to be a wife to Lauren Fulton and a Navy pilot. They are simple dreams, but they are mine, and I wish to pursue them. I am tired of living my life for others. I want to live it for myself.”

“You are making a grave mistake, Lex. You are letting yourself be carried away by your hormones. What if you and Lauren do not make it? What if you were to divorce? You would be left with nothing. You would be nothing.”

“I do not wish to discuss this anymore at the moment. I am due back at Lauren’s right away.”

The next day Alexa had lunch privately with her father. He took a different tone with his daughter, though. “Alexa, your mother tells me you wish to give up the throne to marry Lauren. Is this true?”

“Yes. I was thinking of doing that.”

“Are you sure that is what you want to do?”

“I love her, Father. She means the world to me.”

“I understand that. That does not answer my question. Are you sure you want to abdicate?”

“I cannot marry her otherwise.”

“Again that does not answer my question. Alexa, do you wish to abdicate the throne for you, not Lauren? Do you wish to do this for yourself? Would you do this if Lauren were not in the picture?”

“Lauren is the reason I wish to give up the throne. If she were not in my life, I would marry Meredith and stay heir.”

“You would keep all your responsibilities as heir and then as queen when the time came if Lauren were not in the picture?”

“Yes.”

“Then, my daughter, I fear you are doing this for the wrong reasons. To give up your life for yourself is one thing, but to give it up on the chance at happiness with someone is a perilous proposition. Do you not think that to be the case?”

“I suppose I had not thought of it that way.”

“Well, perhaps you should. Let us assume that Lauren was not in your life. You would marry Meredith and go on as the rightful heir. Do you think that would have made you happy?”

“I guess. I would not have known differently.”

“Would you have embraced your role as princess and then queen when the time came?”

“Yes.”

“Would you have shown compassion to your people?”

“Of course.”

“Would you have done what was in their best interest?”

“Yes. I would not deny them that.”

“Then you cannot abdicate. Alexa, it is time you did embrace your role as princess and heir. The people need you. You sitting on the throne, not George, is what is in their best interest.”

“But I would give up all of that for Lauren. She means that much to me.”

“I know. You are in love, but love can be capricious. It can come and go so quickly we hardly knew what it was when we were looking at it. Let me tell you something that illustrates that point. Your dear grandmother, Lara, did not love Alexa when they married. In fact, she did not fall in love with the queen until she was on her deathbed when it was too late.”

“But that cannot be true. She always spoke of her deep love for my grandmother.”

“Do not get me wrong. Lara loved Alexa, but she did not see the love before her eyes until it was gone. She spent the rest of her life loving a ghost. If you do not believe me, you can read it for yourself. Her diary tells the story of what happened. Lara made her sacrifice for her country. She married a woman she did not love, because it was in the country’s best interest. She was more a queen than even Queen Alexa could have ever predicted. If she was here today, what do you think she would say to you? What do you think she would advise you to do? What is right or what is easy?”

“Abdicating is not easy, Father.”

“I think it is. I think it is easier than facing the fate you know you are meant to live. You know as well as I do that what is right is to stay the course. What is easy is to run away. Lauren will never stop loving you. I have seen it in her eyes. Her heart will always be yours. This marriage to Meredith is of convenience to have heirs. It is political, and she knows that. We have discussed it, and she understands why things have to be a certain way.”

“You have discussed it? When?”

“At your birthday party. She is a good woman. I will not deny that, but she has already accepted the fact that you must follow in the footsteps of your forefathers. Now you must accept that. It is what is right.”

Alexa nodded her head as she thought about her father’s words. She wondered if he was right about her grandmothers and decided to investigate that matter for herself after their meal. Heading to her late grandmother’s library, she pulled the first diary off the shelf and made herself comfortable on the couch to read. Hours passed as she read the details of her grandmothers’ life together. Her father was right. Lara did not love Alexa at first. In fact, the words used to describe the consummation of their marriage led her to believe the act was coerced. The princess could even still see the stains of dried tears on the page running the ink of those memories. Her heart ached at the thought of her beloved grandmother being put through such a thing. However, as the diary continued, the tone shifted. As she read the recollection of that fateful day, the day of Alexa’s ultimate sacrifice, and the days that followed, her heart once again began to pang but this time for both her grandmothers. They had come to love each other, but it was too late. The queen had died saving Faith and Lara. Unable to continue her reading, Alexa closed the book and placed it back on the shelf. Her mind was jumbled with thoughts and feelings. Her heart was conflicted with what she should do. On the one hand, she thought her grandmother would tell her to do what made her happiest, but on the other, she knew if her grandmother could sacrifice for her country, she should be able to as well.

Over the next few weeks, Alexa thought about her course in history. She knew she would have to give her mother an answer soon, and furthermore, she knew she did love Lauren enough to give up the rest of her life. However, whether or not that would be right haunted her.

Lauren in the meantime was thinking about her relationship with Alexa. The time was fast approaching that the princess was to be married, and the librarian didn’t know what would happen after that. She had always believed that it would be wrong to be involved with someone married, but this was an extraordinary case. Her heart had been so completely captured by the princess that she didn’t know what was the right thing to do.

One morning after Alexa had left, she was getting dressed for the day when she received a phone call from the palace. The queen was requesting her presence for tea that afternoon. Lauren had never met Queen Faith before, and furthermore, she could only assume why the queen wanted to see her, leaving her with trepidation about the meeting. However, knowing she was bound to go, she called in sick to work and spent the rest of the morning contemplating what the queen might wish to say to her. Going to the palace, she decided she would meet whatever fate had in store for her with the confidence that Alexa loved her no matter what happened.

When she arrived Matthew was there and gave her a friendly greeting before escorting her to the queen. He announced her arrival and then stated he would be outside waiting to escort Lauren out again when their talk was finished. “Your majesty,” Lauren greeted tentatively, bowing in respect.

“Ms. Fulton, thank you for coming today on such short notice. Please sit and join me for a cup of tea.” The redhead did as she was told, taking the chair the queen had indicated. A server poured them both tea and then left them to their privacy. Lauren just sat there not knowing what to say. “I assume you know why I have asked you to come,” Faith mentioned.

“Actually, your majesty, I do not know. Please enlighten me.”

“You cannot be serious? You have no idea? Alexa has not told you her plans?”

“I am not aware of any plans, your majesty.”

“She wants to abdicate the throne. She has not told you this?”

“She may have mentioned it, but that was weeks ago. We have not talked of it since. I did not think she could be serious.”

“Oh, she is serious, child. She claims she wants to give it all up for your love. She claims she cannot go on without marrying you, Ms. Fulton. She is prepared to leave her entire family, her entire country to run away with you. I asked her to weigh her decision carefully, because it cannot be reversed. She is to give me an answer in a few days time. You knew nothing of this?”

“No, my queen. I did not know.” Both women fell silent for a moment. In absence of something to do, Lauren sipped her tea and waited for whatever the queen might say next. She was shocked at the first disclosure and wondered if others were to follow.

“Tell me, Ms. Fulton. How do you like your job at the library?”

“It is wonderful. The people are nice, and I enjoy being there. Thank you for asking.”

“Did you know that job in which you reside was a donation of the palace? Alexa wanted to see to it that you moved here, so she convinced the library to hire you and made a generous donation to keep you employed. She gave them so much money that they renamed it after my late mother, Lara, at her request. Did you know that she had bought you your position?”

“No. I had no idea,” she answered truthfully. Her heart sunk at the thought that she hadn’t won it on her own merit, but she didn’t say so.

“And what of your home? Are you finding it quite comfortable?”

“Yes.”

“I can only assume based on your salary that it was another gift from my daughter much like the jewelry you are wearing. No librarian could afford to live there or afford diamonds such as those.” Lauren just nodded her head, not knowing where the conversation was going. “So, Ms. Fulton, it seems to me that you have profited quite well from the royal family. Alexa has given you more than just her devotion. She has bestowed expensive tokens of her affection.”

“She has been generous with her gifts, your majesty.” She still wasn’t sure where the conversation was headed but got the inclination she was not going to like it if it continued in the manner it was.

“Tell me something, Ms. Fulton. As a woman does she fulfill all your needs? Do you find her lacking in any way?”

“I am not sure what you mean.” In fact she knew exactly what the queen meant, was just mortified that she had been asked such a question.

“Yes, you do. Do not play coy with me, child.”

“Your majesty, I must decline to answer. That is personal, and I do not wish to share such intimate details of my life.”

“Then tell me this. If Alexa were not who she is, would you find as much fulfillment with her?”

“Your majesty, when I met her I did not know who she was. To me she was just a pilot in the Navy. It took several days for me to figure it out. I fell in love with the pilot first.”

“Well, she is not a pilot. She is the princess. She merely plays at being a pilot as a childish game of make believe. Surely you can understand the difference.”

“Yes.”

“Ms. Fulton, before my daughter met you, she made me a promise that she would marry Lady Adams. She gave me her word. However, upon meeting you, she seems to have decided she cannot live without you. Do you feel the same way?”

“I have never thought I had any option other than to be her mistress,” she confessed. “I know my place in the eyes of the law. If there were another option, I would take it. If Alexa asked me to marry her, I would want to say yes. However, I know that is not possible.”

“Well, at least you understand the position in which you find yourself. You do know that if she abdicates, you two will be allowed to marry. However, you would not be marrying the woman she is now. She would not have any resources. She could not bestow gifts upon you the way she does now. She would hardly be the powerful woman she is today. By abdicating she would be as common as the rest of the citizens in this country. Do you realize that?”

“Yes, I do realize that.”

“Would that make you happy?”

“I would be happy to have Alexa’s love. That would be enough for me.”

“Do you think that would make her happy?”

“I do not know. I am not sure she could suffice without what she is accustomed to having.”

Another paused occurred as both women sipped their tea. Lauren was nearly to the bottom of her cup before the queen spoke again. “How much do you love her?”

“I would do anything for her.”

“Even deny your own happiness?”

“If it was in her best interest.”

Queen Faith nodded her head and put down her cup. Gazing directly into Lauren’s eyes she said, “Then I must ask you to do what is right by her. If you love her, let her go. As long as she thinks she has the faintest chance of being with you, she will give up everything, and she will be miserable for the rest of her life. It is in her best interest for you to let her go. She needs to be queen. It is her rightful place. Tell her you can no longer see each other. Tell her that the relationship between you is over. You can keep your job, your house, your jewelry, and any other tokens she has accorded you as fond memories of a love you once shared, but Lauren, tell her good bye. I must ask this of you. She is not in the right mind to see the harm she is about to do to herself or her country. You obviously are an intelligent woman, and you have the foresight to see where this action will lead. The fact that when she first mentioned the idea you did not encourage her gives me hope that you know what is right. You say you would deny your own happiness if it was in her best interest. I know you know this is what is best for her.”

Lauren could not respond at first. The queen had just asked her to turn her back on her greatest love, but she knew the queen had her reasons. In some respects she was right. Lauren feared Alexa would regret her decision if she abdicated, and she did not want to become the root of resentment for such a rash decision. Lauren finally nodded her head as she put her teacup on the coffee table. “Your majesty, thank you for the tea. I appreciate your candidness about Alexa, and I will take your words under advisement. May I please be excused now? I do not think there is anything left to be said.”

The queen nodded in agreement. “Yes, I have said all I needed to on the subject. You are free to go.”

By the time Lauren arrived back at her house, she noticed her lover’s familiar car in the garage. It was still relatively early in the evening, much earlier than when Alexa normally came by, but she was glad to know she was there. Going into the house, she was greeted by the princess in the living room. One look from Alexa and she started sobbing and threw herself into her lover’s arms.

“Darling, what on earth is the matter?”

Lauren just shook her head, unable to answer. She could only cling to the princess for support as she wept. Her heart was in such agony. Finally words came to her. “Flash,” she whispered.

“Yes, Lauren?”

“Take me upstairs to bed and make love to me all night long. I need you to touch me, hold me. It is only in your arms that the world is right.”

The younger woman nodded her head before scooping the redhead up in her arms. She obliged her lover in her request. Neither strayed from bed the rest of the night and into the dawn. Alexa gently made love to the woman who had her heart and kissed away the trails of tears as they flooded over Lauren’s face. She had never seen anyone so sorrowful in her entire life, and she wondered what had caused her beloved so much pain. She didn’t ask, though, because it was obvious Lauren was not ready to speak about it. Instead she gave her support in the best way she could, acquiescing to all her lover’s needs that night. In the early light of the dawn the two women finally exhausted themselves. Alexa just held Lauren in her arms as the redhead drifted off to sleep and hoped that once Lauren awoke she could speak to her of the great plan she had devised for them.

It wasn’t until late that morning they awoke. Alexa’s eyes were open when Lauren finally turned over. “Good morning, beautiful. How is my darling today? Feeling better I hope.” The older woman said nothing in response just broke their gaze. “Lauren, I have no idea what is wrong. I wish there was something I could do to ease the pain you are feeling whatever might be the cause.”

“There is nothing you can do, Lex.”

“To the contrary, I think there might be. I wanted to give you something last night that I think will cheer you immensely.” The princess rose from bed and retrieved her pants from the floor. Pulling something out of the pocket, she made her way over to Lauren’s side of the bed and dropped down on one knee. “I wanted to give you this,” she said, sliding a small box onto the bed. The librarian just looked at what was obviously a ring box sitting there in front of her, but she didn’t make a move to touch it. “Open it,” Alexa pressed. Lauren did as she was asked. She flipped open the lid to find the most beautiful diamond ring she had ever seen. She looked into dark eyes, knowing her ultimate fantasy was about to unfold. Alexa took the ring from the box with her right hand and took Lauren’s left hand in her own. “Lauren, I love you. Nothing else in this world matters to me but that. You are the best thing that could have ever happened to me, and I count you among the best blessings I have ever received. I want desperately to spend the rest of my life with you, and I will honor and cherish you for as long as we both shall live. Please do me the honor of becoming my wife. Will you marry me?” she humbly requested, slipping the ring onto Lauren’s finger.

Lauren didn’t know she had more tears to shed after the evening she had been through, but they sprang forth in waves covering her cheeks and dripping onto the sheet. She took Alexa by the back of the neck and pushed her head against her shoulder, clutching it to her as her hands caressed dark hair. It was the moment she had long dreamed of since meeting the powerful woman. However, now as it was upon her, she knew there was only one choice to make.

“Alexa, I love you. I do. I really do, but...” She paused as her pain overwhelmed her for a moment. Alexa pulled back to try to look into blue eyes but was denied their gaze.

“Lauren?” she questioned.

Knowing what was right, the librarian forced herself to look the princess in the eyes, the eyes that held so much love for her. The redhead shook her head slowly. “I cannot marry you, Alexa.”

“What? Why not?”

“I told you when you first got engaged to Lady Adams that my heart would tell me what was right in time when it came to us. This is not what is right. I cannot marry you. I cannot allow you to sacrifice your life in this manner. I know what must be done if you were to marry me, and I cannot let you do that, not for me, not for anyone. We must all make our sacrifices to the crown, and this is mine. You must do what is best for the country, and that fate does not include me.”

Unable to believe this was happening, Alexa pressed, “You do not wish to do this. This is your pain, your agony. This is why you are so upset. You love me, and you do not wish to let me go. Tell me so.”

“I must, Alexa. It is the right thing to do. I must let you go to be the great ruler you can be. That life does not have me in it. I would only be a distraction to your true calling. I wish not to see you any more. It is for the best.”

It was Alexa’s turn to start sobbing. She didn’t know her heart could feel so broken. Nevertheless, she knew she had to at least try to remain strong. “This is your final word?” Lauren could only nod her head. “Very well. I will do as you ask of me. I love you enough to give you the freedom you seek. However, if you ever change your mind, you know how to find me. If you ever need or want anything, I am here for you. I love you, Lauren. That will never change. I will continue to support you in whatever way you need. I will continue to pay the mortgage on the house and all your bills. I will continue to support the library, so you have a place to work, and I will continue to love you just as you are. If you need anything else, all you need to do is call Matthew to arrange for anything day or night. I do not care what it is. If you need money or clothes, a new house, whatever, you come to me. Even though we cannot be together, I will still think of you as my wife in spirit. You are in my heart, and you will continue to be for the rest of my life.” Slowly getting to her feet, Alexa pulled on her clothes from the previous night. No other words were spoken, but both women were crying. Looking back over her shoulder to where Lauren lay, Alexa drank in the sight of the woman she dearly loved, the woman who had just shattered her heart. It would be the last moment she ever gazed upon her. Then without another word, she left.

Continued in Chapter 6

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